DO YOUR HOMEWORK!
Imagine Thanksgiving just ended and it is the first Saturday of Christmas shopping. The snow is peacefully falling as if it’s a snow globe and the shops are lined with treasures. You and your loved one are browsing the storefronts with nowhere to go but somewhere. All of a sudden, the gift that you HAVE to buy your best friend catches your eye. You simply cannot keep strolling along without snatching it. Before you know it, you’ve just spent hundreds of dollars on something that will probably not be used after New Years.
Proverbs 7 paints a similar story for us. Here we have a wandering young man strolling about with no plan. One moment he is seemingly fine, the next he is caught by a woman that he simply cannot pass up an opportunity with. “Little does he know that it will cost him.” Proverbs 7:23
The young man “taking a stroll” is a picture of most earthly relationships. He is just aimlessly walking around with no purpose until something feels right. Wisdom allows us to be ready when the right opportunity arises. When it does, we can walk step by step together in a full, God-honoring relationship. We are instructed to “make wisdom your sister,” and earlier in the book of Proverbs we are told, “Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” Proverbs 9:10. Wisdom is the difference between us making an impulsive decision that costs us everything, and making a decision that stands the test of time.
In determining if a relationship is going work or not, the world says, “does it feel right? Yes? Then do it.” God says, “is it wise? Yes? Then the right feelings will follow.” The world sees the relationships that a good Christian marriage has and says “I want that,” so they go running around looking for it. Without a Godly wisdom, they never find it. They just want the solution without the process that wisdom requires. The world’s way always leads to pain and heartache. Wisdom, however, is the keeper of our hearts. Proverbs 4:23 says to “guard your heart above all else. For out of it comes the wellspring of life.”
Proverbs 4:23 says to “guard your heart above all else. For out of it comes the wellspring of life.”
Another thing that our young man with “the aimless walk” shows us is that emotion-filled, impulsiveness leads to dysfunction. It leads to a woman who “doesn’t stay at home.” Home is where we’re supposed to take care and be healthy. Home is fullness, it’s peaceful, it’s loving, it’s joyful, it’s God-first. The woman who doesn’t care about her home doesn’t prioritize health. We shouldn’t even consider people who don’t put God first.
We’re looking for a person who has God first and lives in God’s house. After a couple years of marriage, feelings won’t hold it together. We need to take time to learn the person’s weaknesses and strengths. We need to look for someone who loves God’s house. If they take care of God’s house, they’ll take care of your “together house.”
The final lesson we learn from Proverbs 7 is the idea of faithfulness. The world has turned faithfulness into something "unsexy", into something that lacks passion. When is the last time a movie celebrated a man who said no to an affair? Faithfulness should be celebrated! Godly wisdom makes faithfulness extremely passionate and sexy. Real passion takes people sticking to things through the good times and the bad.
Take your time. Learn the person’s strengths and weaknesses. See them at their best and see them at their worst. Use wisdom when approaching your next relationship. Don’t make impulsive decisions on a street corner.
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